It's All About Me

I don't know if it's because I'm becoming old and grouchy, or - and this seems a much more likely reason - because in my charming naivety I've not previously noticed, but I can't get over how astonishingly inconsiderate and selfish people are in their behaviour toward one another. I don't mean the big picture stuff: oddly enough, as far as I can tell, when it comes to responding to an appeal, or helping people in serious trouble, most folks are generous to a fault. Nor do I want to suggest that people are becoming "more" selfish than they used to be, or that selfishness didn't happen in "my day" (whenever that was). Rather, it seems that it's in the arena of the daily that people just don't seem to give a toss, that they live in some kind of insular bubble that says: I'm the most important reality in the world, and screw anyone and anything that's an inconvenience or which stops me going about my day the way I see fit.

Let me give you some recent examples to illustrate my point.

Last week, my Dearly Beloved and I visited Canberra for a week, partly for pleasure and partly for a conference. We were taking a flight on one of those ultra-low-cost airlines, so, not sure if we'd get anything to eat on the flight itself, we decided to grab a bite before boarding the plane. Or, more accurately, my Dearly Beloved decided we'd have McDonalds as opposed to actually eating food. Being the controller of the family purse-strings, she stood in line to place our order and pay, while I found us a table in the cramped and overcrowded eating space. I eventually snaffled a corner table, and while idly awaiting my Dearly Beloved's arrival with our "food" (I always regard this a provisional term when it comes to McDonalds), I noticed a family of people sitting at the table next to me tucking into what seemed to be a ten course meal. There were bags and cartons and paper wrappings and plastic cups everywhere. Eventually, they completed their repast, and as one, got up and left.

Now, you'll notice I said "got up and left", NOT "tidied up their rubbish, put it in the bin, and left". Because I'm not kidding, they left their table strewn with the detritus of their meal; not merely the bags and wrappings and stuff, but half-eaten burgers, spillages of chips, and cups with congealing ice-cream products still clinging to the sides. And what made this laziness all the more astonishing was the fact that they were sitting right next to the rubbish bin! Seriously, they could have literally reached out and dumped their junk in the bin without having to stand. But no, instead of doing the right thing, they decided that either one of the staff or the next person who wanted to use a table could do their cleaning up for them; whatever they were doing, or wherever they were going, was more important than a simple act of courtesy.

This sort of thing really pisses me off. It's one of the reasons I hate eating in junk food restaurants and shopping centre food malls: the crappiness of the food aside, you have to hunt around endlessly for a table because too many lazy, thoughtless cretins have left it strewn with their garbage. Hell, the waiting staff can clean up after me; or, if the staff are too busy, then the next customer can get their hands dirty removing my leftovers. Me, I'm too busy and important to put my rubbish on a tray and take five steps out of my way to the bin.

Don't you just long to grab these people by the shirtfront and introduce them to the concept of extreme retributive violence? Just like the two women my Dearly Beloved and I encountered at the War Memorial in Canberra during our aforementioned visit to the nation's capital. We were on the alcove overlooking a vast hall filled with various fighters and bombers when the PA announced that a brief show about Australian bomber crews in WWII would be displayed on the wall opposite; the alcove on which we were standing was the viewing platform. So we settled down on some nearby seating to wait, accompanied by other people who likewise sat or stood behind the seats or to one side. There was plenty of viewing space, and two screens on the wall opposite: there would be plenty to see, I thought to myself in anticipation, especially given the alcove's safety barrier was made of thick but clear glass that enabled you to view the show.

And then along came these two women. And because they wanted the best view in the house, they came and stood right in front of us! Only two steps to the left, and they would have had a clear view of everything, and left our visual field unimpeded; but no, other people simply didn't enter into their calculations. They wanted to see the show, and screw anyone else inconvenienced in the process. Moreover, had my Dearly Beloved and I stood in order to see the show, we would have blocked the view of the people next to us, and thus set off a chain reaction of inconvenience. As a result, we were stuck with three quarters of one screen, with the other completly blocked.

I don't want to make a mountain out of a molehill, but it's this kind of daily insensitivity and selfishness that I have begun to notice lately. And I've come to the conclusion that it's because it occurs in the realm of the day-to-day that people think that's it's not important, or can't adversely affect others, or that if it does, then the person on the receiving end should just "get over it". In other words, it's a direct consequence of the "whatever" culture in which self-absorption is a virtue and any objection to imposing upon others an unjustifiable assault on the individual's right to do as they please.

And yet this kind of stuff does matter, because it's precisely the kind of thing that can destroy a person's day, or at least annoy them to such an extent that they then become pre-occupied and do something thoughtless themselves, or have an accident, or get into a pointless argument. In other words, each act of selfishness, however trivial, is like a stone dropped into a pond: the ripples spread out from the event, affecting other aspects of life, and meeting and adding to the potency of other ripples from other events. What starts off as a careless, throw-away event come become something much more significant.

So my plea is simple: next time you're in a food court or fast food joint, please, please, please put your rubbish in the bin. Not only will you be making the environment for everyone more pleasant, you'll potentially be saving yourself from the the experience of having your shirtfront gathered up in angry fistfulls, followed shortly thereafter by a good nutting or a knee to the bollocks.

Talk to you soon,

BB.

Quote for the Day: Laziness is riding a bike over cobblestones just to knock the ash off a cigarette. (Les Dawson)